Little Megan Big World

The Roloff family are the stars of Little People Big World on TLC. Mom, Dad and one of the children are little people, and the other three children are average sized. They're always having to adjust to the average world in ways that I understand, though at 4'11'' I am not technically considered a dwarf.

I had to have an ergonomic evaluation because my chair wasn't high enough or my desk wasn't low enough, and this cheap-ass plastic footstool sucks. I'm never comfortable at work. I'm either sitting with one leg up on the chair, or both feet on the computer console, ankles crossed. Half of my butt falls asleep, or my bent knee begins to hurt. When I stand up from the chair I stagger like an arthritic, elderly person, which totally foils my effort to be a young and hip member of my tech-team.

I finally asked for a different chair or a different footstool or both. Though I'd prefer a soft, velvety, wingback chair and an ottoman, I'm sure that setup would promote napping more than efficiency.

The chair I have been using is made of a grey-black, scratchy fabric, with tech-looking design details on the plastic back. The back doesn't move at all, because the tension is so high, my weight doesn't budge it. So I constantly feel pushed forward, out of the seat. I can adjust the height to make it more comfortable with the stationary desk area, but only days later the seat has mysteriously sunk back down to its lowest height. Though I worry about my weight, I'm fairly sure that's not the cause of the sinking seat.

Anyway - these two HR Ladies came down to my windowless basement cube to look at my footrest and told me that was the only type we have here. I had it backwards, though, which they say may have been why it doesn't seem comfortable. As for the chair, most of the chairs here are broken, stained, bent or otherwise ruined, and the company does not deem this an important expense. None of the chairs in this area would work, so the HR ladies brought me a chair from somewhere else in the building - the secret stockpile of working chairs.

Exchanging my bad chair for the good chair was not so simple. The good chair had bad, wobbly armrests attached to it that would not adjust up or down. The HR ladies struggled to unbolt the armrests with wrenches, delicately attempting to avoid breaking a painted nail. The bolts required a different wrench, which Rodney, an average-Samoan-sized colleague retrieved from his truck. He was able to help them disconnect the armrests so that I could sit in my ergonomically adjustable chair and work.

These people were in my cube for about 20 minutes, but it seemed like an hour. This is not the type of attention I want. One of the HR Ladies seemed quite pleasant in that HR way. She's clearly nice to everyone, at least to their face. The other one barely looked at me, and I began to suspect she resented me for making her crawl around on the floor with a tool. The nice HR Lady just smiled passively and mumbled something about this being "the law" when I thanked her profusely for the great effort they were making to help me. That did not convince me of her innate pleasantness, and in fact made her smile seem more false.

I've never been self-conscious about my height - my stature. Weight - yes. Height - no. Today I'm feeling like an ugly, older dwarf who's just now realized I'm different and small. Really - I never think of myself as short, unless I'm looking at someone who's my height. Then, when I realize I'm as short as that person, I see myself as small.

The chair issue makes me feel small, and not in an interesting or attractive or cute way. Just small.